Adios amigo

So, after contract negotiation avoidance, Twitter outbursts and weeks if not months of speculation, Jose Enrique has finally swapped St James' Park for Anfield. The writing was on the wall yesterday, with the publication of a posed photo from the medical - a besuited doctor taking the Spaniard's blood pressure while he grinned from ear to ear, wearing a Liverpool T-shirt.

As so often seems to be the case with players who've left Tyneside, his initial comments appeared as much a barbed commentary on his former employers as a glowing endorsement of his new club: "I am excited by the new signings - it shows Liverpool's ambition. They spent a lot of money in January on Andy and Luis Suarez, and this summer they've spent a lot of money on other players. You can see they have big ambitions and that's why I came here - because I want to win things and I think I can do that here". Jabba will no doubt again be nettled by his words, but this time has no recourse to a fine.

The protracted, rather unsavoury and messy nature of Enrique's departure shouldn't detract from the fact that, after a couple of seasons finding his feet in English football, he was tremendous in our promotion season and again as we reacclimatised to life in the top flight. My reaction is more of frustration and disappointment than outright anger - the increasingly inevitability of the move put paid to that. For his part, Alan Pardew expressed a kind of resigned and wearied acceptance, reading from the Jabba-prepared script about the importance of financial stability while bemoaning the loss of another of his star men.

Liverpool can congratulate themselves on picking up a skillful and accomplished defender who was among the Premier League's very best in his position last season, and for a very respectable fee - roughly the same as we paid Villareal when he was still a raw and unproven 21-year-old.

As with Rocky, though, the Scousers have contrived to cause us maximum damage by leaving the deal so late. We still have more than two weeks to find a replacement (Erik Pieters, hopefully) before the transfer window shuts, but with no natural substitute at the club and Shane Ferguson injured, we face the prospect of trying to beat Arsenal in tomorrow's curtain-opener with Danny Simpson, James Perch or even Steven Taylor at left-back...

A fine mess

I wonder whether Jose Enrique regrets Sunday night's anti-Jabba Twitter rant, now that his paymaster has hit him with a fine of two weeks' wages (£100,000 to you and me)? Probably not - it'll just have hardened the Spaniard's resolve to escape from Tyneside. It would be interesting to know whether Wayne Routledge also got a ticking off for claiming his wantaway team-mate had "hit the nail on the head".

Having given Enrique a stern talking to, Alan Pardew pontificated on the dangers of Twitter in the manner of a sinister Thought Policeman: "I'm all for people expressing themselves - they just have to be very careful". If the club is trying to control the social networking activities of the players, then it's got its work cut out given the number of them who are now active on Twitter. It'd be a challenge to gag or muzzle ASBO, let alone any of the youngsters...

Meanwhile, the Sun also reheated the old news of an interest in Man City's Wayne Bridge as Enrique's replacement, and suggested that we fancy pairing someone with Good Touch For A Big Man with, er, Big Lad.

Up in flames

Wondering what that burning smell is? That'd be Jose Enrique publicly torching his bridges with the club hierarchy. The Spaniard took to Twitter to echo the views of many fans, criticising the policy of letting star players like Rocky and Kevin Nolan leave and then not reinvesting the money in the team. There was also a slight against our clutch of French-born imports, none of whom he apparently deems "quality players".

If this was all a ploy to try to force Jabba's hand, then Enrique's a brave man - our owner has shown he isn't keen on being dictated to. That said, it would seem hard for him to remain at the club now.

Needless to say Enrique's Twitter account has now been deleted, the damage having been done, though at least one of his colleagues used the social networking site to spread a positive message. Congratulations to Danny Simpson, proud father of a newborn baby girl.

Football focus a problem for Jose

Speaking about the two great unknowns in the current squad, ASBO and Jose Enrique, Alan Pardew has underlined his frustration with the latter:

"Joey seems pretty focused on Newcastle whereas the noises coming out of Jose's camp are that he wants to get a new club playing Champions League football.

We cannot offer him that at the moment, so that seems to be his focus. Hopefully that will change. It is a moving feast. We have got to be ready because if he goes, it is going to leave a big hole in the team and we need to fill it quickly. But he does travel to the United States with us.

It is not ideal for us, as you can imagine. It is difficult. We have offered him a massive contract for this football club and he does not seem to want to sign it, so it is a very difficult position."

That alleged desire for Champions League football would presumably rule out a move to Liverpool, who were on his trail long before flogging off flop Paul Konchesky to Leicester. Arsenal, though, could give him what he wants and need to replace Gael Clichy.

Our own attempts to plug the left-back gap, should Enrique leave, have been hit with a setback, royally stymied by Neil Taylor's decision to sign an improved deal with Swansea. It's left us looking a little bit sheepish, our bullish assumption that we'd activated a release clause in his previous deal turning out to be misplaced. Never mind - we move on. Perhaps Burnley's Danny Fox might be a candidate, as recommended by Lloyd of The Two Unfortunates in yesterday's Football League scouting report?

Meanwhile, Pardew also confirmed there's a bid still on the table for a striker - Mevlut Erdinc, I think we can assume - though a reunion with Charles N'Somnia looks unlikely given that Aston Villa seem determined to capture the Frenchman as a replacement for Liverpool-bound ex-Smog Stewart Downing. Kazenga LuaLua appears to be on his way back to Brighton for another loan spell, this time in the Championship, while Pardew also confirmed that Wayne Routledge's future almost certainly lies away from St James' Park.

Finally, he sought to quash rumours of interest in Mr T from Chelsea. Their apparent ardour for our Ivory Coast star will have only been increased by news of the long-term injury to midfield powerhouse Michael Essien. Probably best to brace ourselves for a bid...

Quote of the day

"We all know that's political and not professional".

ASBO continues to presume that making egotistical allegations of prejudice and discrimination with regard to his exclusion from the England squad is a sure-fire way to force himself into Fabio Capello's thoughts.

And this after ASBO had ridiculed the suggestion that former Toon captain Scott Parker might have been more deserving of the Football Writers' Association Player Of The Year award: "He's not in my league ... FACT he s [sic] actually in the championship ... Did I not dismantle him twice, think it was 2-1 at their place, 5-0 at ours!! And they were easily relegated #justsaying" Perhaps spending time with Moz at Glasto has had an effect and now he's back to being the ringleader of the tormentors?

Once again, ASBO's Twitter feed has proven grist to journalists' mills. Someone muzzle him - and quick.

On a related note, Alan Pardew - speaking on BBC Radio Newcastle on Monday - hinted that ASBO might yet see out the final year of his contract on Tyneside, though seemed markedly less confident of retaining Jose Enrique (particularly in view of the fact that, with the sale of Gael Clichy to Man City, Arsenal have now joined Liverpool in the hunt for a new left-back).

Jose's team talk

Talk about a back-handed compliment. Here's what Jose Enrique had to say to BBC's Late Kick-Off:

"It's hard for players like me, Jonas [Gutierrez], Joey Barton and Kevin Nolan - we've played with big names before. But a lot has changed. Before, we had players like Mark Viduka, and now we have players like Williamson and Perch - players who have played in the Championship and they fight to play in the Premier League. We're doing well, we had Michael Owen and players like that and we were relegated, but with this team we will stay in the division."

Way to go, belittling your team-mates by implying they're not "big names" and suggesting they're Championship-quality try-hards rather than Premier League class. Can't imagine that'll have gone down too well in the dressing room.

In fairness to our Spanish left-back, mind, he's only really echoing the sentiments of a lot of supporters. Mike Williamson has been largely sound this season but looked totally out of his depth on Sunday, while James Perch has yet to convince us (and Alan Pardew too) that he's anything more than a solid chugger at Championship level.

Ultimately, though, we want a successful Newcastle team and, for this season at least, that's one that does no more or less than survive in the top flight. If that can be achieved without the flashy stars, marquee signings and Billy Big Bollocks of yore - and let's face it, far too many of those haven't worked out - then we'll have no complaints.

Inevitably Enrique was also questioned about his future, contract talks still being on ice - and equally inevitably his response has been the primary focus of reports on the interview: "If I have to continue here, I'm happy. If I have to go to another club, I'm happy in England. If I have to go to another league, I'm happy. I just want to play football - it's my life and it's best for me." An inscrutable reply, though it's certainly no firm statement of allegiance.

If he does decide to depart, the papers have been suggesting possible replacements, the Sun and the Daily Heil agreeing on Franck Tabanou of Toulouse. Tabanou is nominally a left winger but has been pressed into service as a full-back this season - he's impressed in his makeshift role, but is the mere thought bringing back nightmare visions of Damien Duff for anyone else?

Playing percentages

In the light of Ol' Big Nose's media babblings about Jose Enrique, it was no surprise to see Alan Pardew issuing a swift rebuttal telling the Ronny Gill today: "There’s definitely no deal between the clubs – 100%."

So Alan, is this the same 100% certainty that all of the Rocky cash will go back into the club? And, given this is a footballing matter we're talking about, if you really are certain then surely it should be 110%?

Bigmouthnose strikes again

With a hooter of such unfeasible proportions, it must admittedly be difficult for Phil Thompson to keep his nose out of other people's business. Still, that hardly excuses the overexcitable Scouse Sky pundit for openly claiming that the mooted Jose-Enrique-to-Liverpool summer transfer is a done deal. Of course, that's not to say it won't happen - on the contrary, given both their desperate need of a left back and Jabba's apparent policy of flogging our best players for a pretty penny and replacing them on the cheap, Thompson's claim is actually quite likely to prove true.

Quote of the day*

"It is flattering that Liverpool are interested. I've also heard that Manchester United and Aston Villa have asked about me. They are both big teams and I'm not closing the door on anyone. I'm ambitious and want to play in the Champions League. I want to win things. I'm OK at Newcastle but I aspire to more. I love the fans here and suffered with them when we were relegated. But we have to be realistic. Newcastle aren't performing well."

Jose Enrique's alleged comments to a Spanish journalist, as reported by the Sun. He's since issued the standard defence - namely, that what he actually said has been taken out of context and grossly misrepresented.

It's a difficult one to call, this. On the one hand, as I've said before, it's no surprise that Champions League clubs might be sniffing around given the level of his performances over the last season and a half, and no doubt knowing you're in demand is flattering. However, the comment about us not performing well just doesn't ring true - fair enough, the actual results haven't been great since Christmas, but the displays have been largely good and deserving of better points rewards - so it's to be hoped this is primarily media mischief-making.

Meanwhile, Fraser Forster made amends for his recent red card against Rangers in the Scottish Cup by keeping a clean sheet as Celtic strode to a 3-0 win and an eight-point advantage over their Old Firm rivals at the top of the SPL. It was a good weekend for a couple of our other loanees too, with Ben Tozer scoring Northampton's goal in a 1-1 draw with Aldershot and fellow defender James Tavernier playing his part in a 7-2 romp for Gateshead at Wrexham. Among the Heed's scorers was Martin Brittain, who's been plying his trade there since 2009.

And finally, there's a review of the book to which Paul and I contributed, Pay As You Play, up on The Two Unfortunates. While Gershenkron flags up the limitations of the Current Transfer Purchase Price as a measurement (it can't take into account wages, for instance), his verdict is largely favourable.

* Well, last Friday, at least.

El juego que espera*

Safety first - that's Alan Pardew's response to the question of when talks of a new contract for Jose Enrique can begin. Recruited by Fat Sam in 2007 at a cost of £6.3m, the Spaniard will be a free agent next summer. Initially underwhelming, he's currently in superb form, and with performances like Saturday's at Ewood Park (Paul's match report to come) he's certainly doing his bit to hasten Premier League survival for the team and discussions over a new deal for himself.

Not surprisingly, a clutch of top-flight rivals are allegedly casting covetous glances in Enrique's direction - including Liverpool, in desperate need of a decent left-back after the walking disaster that's been Paul Konchesky. His affection for Newcastle is evident, but it remains to be seen how Jabba will react to the anticipated demands of improved terms when talks do get underway. He could yet find himself once again supplying the ammunition for Rocky - hopefully not, though.

Speaking of whom... If those responsible for setting ablaze Rocky's new motor back in October fancy torching another Range Rover parked on Kevin Nolan's drive, they've got a great window of opportunity. Our skipper's Chelsea tractor won't be going anywhere for the next 60 days, after he was banned from driving for speeding today. Another one to chalk up for the Toon Motoring Hall Of Shame.

On a happier note, happy 60th birthday to Kevin Keegan. Appropriate that the man who sang inflicted on the world 'Head Over Heels In Love' should reach that ripe old age on Valentine's Day. Many happy returns, King Kev.

(* "The waiting game" in Spanish, if Babelfish is to be trusted...)

Feliz Navidad

A belated Merry Christmas from Paul and I. Hope you and yours had a good one yesterday, and may this afternoon bring further festive cheer in the form of three points.

The official site has had a procession of players delivering their Christmas messages to fans. These brought few revelations of any interest - Rocky loved to visit the Fenwick's windows as a kid, sparring partner Steven Taylor looks forward to the first festive Coca-Cola advert, the Xisco Kid isn't a fan of wintry weather - while Jose Enrique mentioned an unusual way of paying tributes to team-mates: "I saw in Christmas at the house of Fabricio Coloccini and his family, along with my girlfriend Eva, and some of our friends, and it was great to watch the children open their presents. Colo's son, Tiago, even got a Spiderman outfit in honour of Jonas Gutierrez!"