Ba's French fancy

What with the transfer window being open, it was never going to be long before we had our first case of verbal diarrhoea. "I have always supported PSG and it's a club that is enticing but it will be difficult to do that in January", Demba Ba has been quoted as saying. The player's denial - or at least the claim that the comments were taken out of context - followed swiftly afterwards.

Ba's hometown club wouldn't be alone in taking an interest in our striker, with pretty much all six clubs currently above us in the table reportedly keen. As yet, though, no offers have been forthcoming - and that despite Droopy's attempts to flog him for us. Ever the wheeler-dealer, eh, 'Arry? Keep your fleshy beak and the rest of your flabby face out of our business.

If, hypothetically speaking, Ba was to be sold, then speculation's been rife that his replacement could be the man he himself replaced - rumours rubbished by Rocky's agent as well as his manager Kenny Dalglish. While the prospect of re-signing the striker for £25m less than we sold him would clearly be appealing, it's a moot point, really: we play a different style of football now without a bullying presence up front, and Jabba would be very unlikely to sanction a transfer fee or wages that hefty. Still, stranger things have happened on Tyneside.

Might we soon find ourselves linked with another old boy, though? It seems Sebastien Bassong is getting frustrated at warming Droopy's bench, we're in the market for a central defender, and a left-footer would complement Sideshow Bob nicely. Incidentally, that particular hole definitely won't be plugged by former triallist Darnel Situ, who has now finally signed for Swansea.