No respite - and no excuses either

Brighton 2 - 0 Newcastle Utd

First of all, I'd like to apologise to ITV on behalf of my team for the failure to pull off the FA Cup upset they were so clearly hoping would take place, given the game had been selected for live lunchtime transmission. What can I say - we were the plucky Premier League underdogs, after all, up against the might of a fair to middling Championship side. There's always next year, though - why not come and watch us have another futile stab at a giant-killing at Barnet next January?

Afraid I can't couch this whole report in sarcasm. So here goes... The defeat may have been predictable, given our form and injury list, but it's worth noting that our conquerors didn't win a single game in December so weren't exactly in great shape either. Quite frankly, our performance was appalling - an utter embarrassment, outclassed from first minute to last. Brighton might as well have been handed a bye into the Fourth Round.

The starting XI showed five changes from the side that played well enough but lost at home to Everton on Wednesday. Sylvain Marveaux and Tim Krul dropped to the bench, Papiss Cisse and Sideshow Bob were left on Tyneside to nurse strains and Mr T had already jetted off to join up with the Ivory Coast squad ahead of the Africa Cup of Nations. Into the team came Rob Elliot and the callow quartet of James Tavernier, Master T, Mehdi Abeid and Little Big Lad.

Our hosts made much the brighter start, zipping the ball about as we chased shadows. Perchinho headed away an effort from Gary Dicker, though it's not certain it was going in, while David Lopez - a winger operating at right-back - was giving us some headaches out wide.

Gradually we started to retain a bit of possession, but hoofball seemed to be our primary tactic from the outset, Big Lad tussling repeatedly with his marker Adam El Abd. Master T blasted a shot straight at Casper Ankergren which the 'keeper could only parry out, though no one was following in, and Obertan Kenobi embarked on the odd reasonable dash down the right.

However, it was our French winger who was then largely at fault for the opening goal. Gordon Greer's raking diagonal pass was hooked back on the by-line by evergreen left-back Wayne Bridge, who had been untracked by Kenobi. Andrea Orlandi touched the ball around a bamboozled Mike Williamson and improvised a smart volleyed finish into the bottom corner.

This appeared to deflate rather than sting the visitors in black and white, who only had a wayward Vurnon Anita drive to show for the rest of the half. The game was particularly being lost in midfield, where Dean Hammond and Liam Bridcutt were bossing the show and Abeid was utterly useless.

That changes were needed at the break was obvious. We've excused the Silver Fox from much criticism this season (rightly, I think), but on this occasion his decision-making deserves comment. The removal of Abeid was inevitable, though Perchinho's withdrawal with a knock was forced. However, it's the choice of replacements that is contentious: the Lone Ranger, to partner Big Lad up front, and debutant Paul Dummett at left-back, with Davide Santon's offensive threat neutralised by shifting him to the right. Meanwhile, Sylvain Marveaux and Shane Ferguson - both crafty and capable of creating chances - kicked their heels on the bench.

The two substitutions duly had negligible impact and shortly after the hour an already grim afternoon got grimmer. Big Lad was already on one very soft booking when he made contact with Lopez, the Spaniard's disgraceful amateur dramatics earning our skipper for the day another undeserved caution from referee Lee Probert and an early bath and prompting ASBO to take to Twitter to express his incredulity.

Down to ten men and with the Lone Ranger now the focal point of our attack - things certainly didn't look good. But, with Marveaux belatedly introduced to immediate effect, we raised our game slightly. He had a venomous half-volley well blocked by Bridcutt, while the Lone Ranger headed over under pressure, Little Big Lad had a deflected shot clawed away by Ankergren and a Dummett cross just eluded our forwards.

But then, just as we were starting to believe in the possibility of an equaliser, came the killer blow. Slick-haired substitute Will Hoskins benefited from yet another defensive error from Williamson and, latching onto an easy through-ball, slid a shot under Elliot.

It could have been worse had substitute Kazenga Lua Lua, who had seemingly made it his mission to crucify Santon at every opportunity, not shot into the side netting. The Lone Ranger did have a shot smothered from close range and Williamson another blocked by a sliding defender, but for our pathetic effort and shapelessness we thoroughly deserved to end the game goalless. Brighton won without regularly extending Elliot, and Craig Mackail-Smith had a poor game and yet still our central defence looked like it could get blown apart by a one-year-old blowing out the candle on their birthday cake.

So, our fourth FA Cup tie against the Seagulls, and our fourth defeat. Any positives? Some will say a cup run would have been a dangerous distraction from our Premier League troubles - not me, though. Why should we be glad to be out of the only competition we still had a vague chance of winning? And if defeat was actually a desirable outcome, then where does that leave the fans who left Tyneside at an ungodly hour to make the lunchtime kick-off and applauded the team despite the crap they'd just served up? Deserving of refunds, perhaps. Nobby was among those who sympathised with our plight. But sympathy is all fine and well - what we need is investment and results.

(Of course, Saturday afternoon then just kept on giving: along the south coast, a debut brace for Demba Ba as his new side, holders Chelsea, swept aside Southampton; a two-goal fightback from the Mackems just when we were hoping they'd be making their own ignominious exit from the competition at the hands of Championship opposition...)

Other reports: BBC, Observer

The future's Bright(on)

The Third Round draw for the FA Cup has handed us the pleasure of a slog all the way to the south coast to face Gus Poyet's Brighton.

Given that Brighton are currently eighth in the Championship and the run of success which Poyet enjoyed over us as a player and frankly at the present time, this game has banana skin written all over it. Hopefully though, by the time the game is played we might have found a bit of form by the first weekend in January.

Po-yet again

Brighton 1 - 0 Newcastle Utd

While not on a par with last season's humiliating defeat to Stevenage, and without doubt something of a miscarriage of justice, our umpteenth FA Cup exit at the hands of Gus Poyet was nevertheless a huge disappointment. We toiled away, controlled possession and dominated in terms of chances - but the performance was ultimately somewhat flat, as we failed to beat an eminently beatable side.

There could be no question over how seriously the Silver Fox was taking the competition, the side he sent out being the strongest available to him. James Perch deputised for injured skipper Sideshow Bob (to surprisingly good effect, it transpired), but otherwise it was the team that collapsed at Craven Cottage, albeit with a slightly different formation.

We started much the better of the two sides, Leon O'Best expertly controlling a long pass and flashing his shot just wide of the post before ballooning a presentable chance over the bar and into the stands with his head. Danny Simpson went closer after neat interplay with HBA, bursting into the box and blasting a shot that Brighton 'keeper Peter Brezovan repelled, but otherwise opportunities were few and far between.

Our hosts, meanwhile, were largely non-existent as an attacking threat, their most offensive moment of the first half being Matt Sparrow's very un-sparrow-like lunge on Dreamboat, which could have earned him more than just the yellow that probably prompted his withdrawal at the break.

We began the second period with a similar statement of intent to the first, both O'Best and Big Lad calling Brezovan into action. Dreamboat too tried his luck on a couple of occasions, but with the breakthrough continuing to elude us he suffered a moment of madness, tangling with Adam El-Abd on the turf and extending a boot which connected with the defender's ugly mug. Referee Lee Probert missed the incident, but I suspect that trial by retrospective video analysis will find the Frenchman guilty.

The Seagulls then belatedly brought Tim Krul into the game, Craig Mackail-Smith denied a second cup goal against us following his strike for Peterborough in the League Cup in 2009. And seven minutes later they had the lead. Energetic midfielder and (naturally) boyhood Toon fan Will Buckley skipped away from Simpson's lame challenge (in his defence, as the Silver Fox pointed out, our full-back would have risked picking up a second yellow had he got his timings slightly wrong), drove into the box and, not sufficiently pressured by Dreamboat, hit a wayward shot that Mike Williamson inadvertently deflected over Krul's dive. A case of deja vu - the same happened for Stevenage's opener last January.

The Silver Fox's response was to make a triple substitution, with Shane Ferguson, Dan Gosling and Raylor introduced for Davide Santon, Danny Guthrie and HBA respectively - a curious move, given that we were desperate for a goal, time was rapidly running out and we had a striker, Peter Lovenkrands, left kicking his heels on the bench. In fairness to the manager, Ferguson and Raylor gave us greater penetration on the flanks but they couldn't set up the chance we needed to breach a defence in which alleged target Lewis Dunk did reasonably well.

We were, however, denied a blatant late penalty when Ashley Barnes pulled off a diving save to push Dreamboat's 20-yard effort away - an appalling miss by Probert, even if Brighton will argue our midfielder shouldn't have still been on the pitch.

So it was Poyet and sidekick Mauricio Taricco - who enjoyed a second-half touchline spat with John Carver - who were celebrating on the final whistle, as we came to terms with the fact that we still haven't won an away tie in this competition since 2006. Nevertheless, trying to look on the bright side, Brighton were subsequently drawn away at Man Utd's conquerors Liverpool - perhaps avoiding another abject defeat at Anfield is a blessing in disguise...

Other reports: , Guardian

Kaz checks out

To the surprise of very few, Kazenga LuaLua has followed in the footsteps of his older brother by turning a loan into a permanent deal and leaving St James' Park for the south coast. While Lomano Tresor, now at Blackpool, departed for Portsmouth, Kaz has signed up with Brighton, with whom he's had three separate loan spells, for an undisclosed fee.

He undoubtedly has some ability, as well as the pace necessary to trouble a few Premier League opponents, but ultimately he becomes just another graduate of our youth development programme who's failed to make the grade. Time will tell if we've made a mistake - probably when we draw the Seagulls in the FA Cup in January...

Steve Harper, by contrast, won't be staying on at the Amex, his own one-month loan deal having expired and no agreement reached on an extension. Nevertheless, he enthused about the experience, describing it as "very, very beneficial".

Seagull Steve

Farewell, albeit temporarily, to Steve Harper, our erstwhile first-choice 'keeper having yesterday joined Kazenga LuaLua on loan at Championship outfit Brighton.

After years playing underemployed understudy to Shay Given followed by a couple of much-deserved seasons in the limelight, Harper has this campaign once again found himself out of favour, displaced by Tim Krul. Harsh, it's true, but even he couldn't dispute the Dutchman's brilliance. Since being handed his chance by Alan Pardew, Krul's not put a foot wrong.

Pardew's comment that Harper's "unfortunate to have a top young goalkeeper like Tim come through and push him to one side" glosses over the fact that Krul's selection has been the manager's decision, or that Pardew also chose to bring in another 'keeper over the summer, Charlton's Rob Elliot. The loan period is for an initial month, so he could well be back on Tyneside before too long - but the writing does seem to be on the wall.

Harper didn't have to wait long for his debut, slotting straight into the Seagulls side that took on West Ham at the Amex, at the expense of Casper Ankergren. And it was a familiar face who got the better of him for what proved to be the only goal of the game, Kevin Nolan scoring from distance to put Fat Sam's side second and condemn the division's early-season pacesetters to a seventh consecutive match without a win.