It won't be alright on the night

After over a year of waiting around due to injury, Jonathan Woodgate finally got the chance to make his competitive debut for Real Madrid and shore up their porous defence against Athletico Bilbao.

Well, that was the plan, anyway. What actually happened was that he put through his own net with a flying header before getting sent off for a second bookable offence.

"Inauspicious" is the word you're looking for, Jonathan. At least Real won, though.

In the long term I sincerely hope that Woody does well in Spain - ridiculously injury-prone he may be, but when fit he was without doubt the finest defender I've ever seen in a black and white shirt, throwing into sharp relief the crapness of those around him. How we could do with him - injury-free of course - right now.