Fright night

It seems our Wednesday evening ordeal wasn't ended by the final whistle at the Liberty Stadium, with high winds making the flight back to Tyneside, and the landing in particular, somewhat hairy. While the Silver Fox  refuted claims that some players had been screaming (a claim nevertheless repeated in the Daily Heil), he did his best to embarrass his assistant: "John Carver had a little bit of a wobble, he wasn't so brave and looked a bit white when we got off." It remains to be seen whether that was due to the flight or to the prospect of a trip to Old Trafford off the back of a beating from the previously poor-at-home Swans...

Ins, outs, downs, (call) ups

In: John Carver, named as Alan Pardew's right-hand man for the rest of the season. It's a homecoming for the man who worked under King Kev, Kenny Dalglish and Ruud Gullit before becoming assistant to Sir Bobby Robson. Since leaving the club when Graeme Soumess took charge in September 2004, he's toured the country, pitching up at Leeds, Luton, Plymouth and most recently Sheffield United (as assistant to ex-Toon midfielder and now Wales boss Gary Speed), and even had a managerial spell of just over a year across the pond with MLS outfit Toronto. The arrangement is only temporary at present, but Pardew has hailed Carver's "excellent track record as a coach" and also suggested that the returning Geordie's prior knowledge of life at St James' Park will come in useful.

Out: Wayne Routledge, who looks to be on his way back to QPR, just a year after they sold him to us. It's a loan deal that will, apparently, become permanent if the Londoners maintain their current position and follow us up to the Premier League. The winger was arguably our most effective signing of last January's transfer window, adding a fresh dimension to the squad and contributing assists and goals just when we needed a boost to maintain our trajectory towards promotion. I, at least, had hopes that after disappointing top-flight spells with Spurs, Villa, Fulham and Crystal Palace, Routledge would at last shine in the Premier League - but it hasn't really happened, not least because ASBO and his superior set-piece delivery has kept him largely sidelined. The decision to let him go suggests that a replacement may be forthcoming (Sebastian Larsson perhaps?), but also narrows our options somewhat - without Routledge we have very few players who can terrorise defenders with sheer pace.

Down: Alan Smith, who hobbled away from the Stadium of Shite on Sunday with an ankle injury - his Achilles heel, so to speak. It's tempting to venture that the enforced absence of the slow, clumsy bludger might actually be beneficial to the side, with the more creative duo of Danny Guthrie and Dan Gosling waiting in the wings. But the fact that Spurs, one of the most dangerous offensive sides in the league, are our visitors on Saturday means that lining up with a defensive midfielder is definitely desirable - Cheik Tiote's idiotic ban looking all the more potentially damaging.

(Call) up: Big Lad, who at the age of 29 looks set to make his international bow for Nigeria, the country of his birth, against Guatemala next month. The former England U21 man enthused (in his best Geordie accent): "I didn't think twice about finally returning home". In turning out for the Super Eagles he'll be following in the footsteps of two recent players remembered with varying degrees of affection on Tyneside: Obafemi Martins and Celestine Babayaro.

Taylor made for Toon?

Why have two Taylors at the club when you can have three? If the Guardian is to be believed, Peter Taylor could be about to join Steven and Ryan on Tyneside, taking up the position of Alan Pardew's right-hand man. When asked about the rumour, the much-travelled Bradford City manager conceded: "There is something in it".

In other Toon-related managerial shenanigans, it's being reported that Chris Hughton is in line to take the reins at relegation-threatened Crystal Palace, George Burley having been given the boot on Saturday. We'd like nothing better than to see him score a new job and excel - and the Championship's a division in which he knows how to succeed.

Meanwhile, having been appointed as Gary Speed's assistant at Sheffield Utd in the summer and then as his caretaker replacement until Micky Adams' arrival last month, John Carver has now left the Blades. Mark Stimson's spell in charge at Barnet has proved equally short-lived, our former left-back sacked with the club in serious danger of slipping out of the Football League.

Finally, Tony Jimenez has bought himself a place on the board at Charlton as part of a takeover deal. Heaven help the Addicks if our shadowy erstwhile "vice-president (player recruitment)" invites the Poison Dwarf to come and line his pockets...

Update

It seems as though the appointment of Peter Taylor won't be happening after all. According to Bradford's joint chairman Mark Lawn, we got as close as agreeing compensation, only for Taylor to retreat and reaffirm his commitment to the Bantams. Back to square one for Pardew, then.

Similarly, Crystal Palace chairman Steve Parish has poured cold water on the speculation about Chris Hughton: "I have never met him in my life. He came to the Millwall game presumably because he was in town and he wanted to take in a game in London. That obviously set everybody talking. But I've not spoken to Chris, I've not had a job application from Chris, obviously he's a very good young manager so if he applies for the job we would consider it out of courtesy, but I've not spoken to him and I don't even know if he wants the job."