Premature ejaculation

If you were hoping that a spark of magic from HBA might secure us an unlikely result at the Emirates tonight, then you'll have to face the bitter reality that he's not going to feature at all. And how do we know this? Because he's revealed as much on Instragram.

This isn't the first time a Newcastle player has taken to social media to break the news of their unavailability for a match - Jose Enrique announced he was injured on Twitter ahead of a trip to Spurs back in 2011. On that occasion his account was soon suspended, and one imagines that the powers-that-be may take a similarly dim view of HBA broadcasting via an unofficial channel something that the Silver Fox may have preferred to keep very much under wraps. Not that it's information I feel will be essential to smoothing Arsenal's path to victory, mind - they really don't need any additional help...