Thursday, April 01, 2010

A Month Of Saturdays: March 2010

The blows rained down in March, as our team of superheroes and scrappers continued to pick up the points to leave the opposition teetering on the ropes by the end of the month.

BANG! We started the month with a 2-1 away win at Watford (which Ben presciently titled "Saturday Night's Alright (For Fighting)").

CRASH! We followed up that win with the 6-1 demolition of Barnsley.

THWACK! We traded blows with the Smogs before coming away with a creditable 2-2 draw.

BASH! We pounded Scunthorpe 3-0.

POW! We came away from Ashton Gate with a solid 2-2 draw after a fightback against a Bristol City team who'd only recently parted company with their manager.

KABLAM! We did enough to overcome a lively Doncaster Rovers 1-0.

CRUNCH! We defeated a spirited Nottingham Forest 2-0 to leave us tantalisingly close to a return to the Premier League.

As Tim Westwood might say, this was the month in which we landed "heavy hit, after heavy hit" on our title rivals.

Off the pitch, it was a similar story of blows traded, with the depressing news that Steven Taylor's return from injury has been delayed following an alleged disagreement with Bigger Lad which left the former with a broken jaw and the latter with bandaged hands. For once, though, it was refreshing to see Newcastle close ranks with no "club insider" quotes seeping forth - which left at least one journalist with an axe to grind.

Sky landed something of a body blow of their own, with their insistence that our match away to Plymouth be moved to a Monday night - an away trip that in a small way echoes the latest Toon-linked film (directed by Llambiarse's son Warren). Meanwhile, the director's father chose his moment to once again explain why we should be grateful for Jabba's cash - something I took particular issue with.

However, given David Gold's complaints about a former member of our parish, it was perhaps unsurprising to learn that Jabba has sought to implement a salary cap at St James'.

Kevin Nolan beat allcomers to be crowned Football League Player of the Year and Steven Taylor picked up the North East Sports Personality of the Year, whilst a former winner got a bit annoyed with some questions from the Guardian.

Spidermag enjoyed a prolific month in front of goal, scoring twice to boost his prospects of inclusion in Diego Maradonna's Argentina squad for the World Cup, and seeing the fans respond with an internet-led campaign to get as many people as possible sporting Spiderman masks at the Forest home match - and on the the subject of South American superheroes, Ben bumped into Nobby Solano in a Cardiff bar.

Looking further afield, a knockout blow for Phil Brown saw our former assistant manager Iain Dowie charged with masterminding Hull's battle against relegation, and Charlie Crowe, the last surviving member of our 1951 FA Cup winning team, was sadly counted out.


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