Hired help

Today brought both an admission from Chris Hughton in the Chronicle that things didn't quite go to plan on deadline-of-sorts day - "We made moves on Tuesday and they didn't work" - and an insistence that we'll continue to explore potential loan opportunities right up until the deadline proper.

The identities of the players in question remain unknown, though Hughton did confess that interest in Villa's Marlon Harewood - a man who bears a passing resemblance to Homer Simpson and often displays similar haplessness to Springfield's favourite son - had come to nowt, as had attempts to bring in Craig Cathcart, a defensive colleague of Danny Simpson's at Old Trafford. Our chances of recruiting probably haven't been helped by the defection of chief scout Lil Fuccillo to Championship rivals Swansea, either...

Surely there are loads of Premier League fringe players who would be happy to drop down a division to get some games with the side currently topping the table? To name but a random handful who would be welcome temporary arrivals and who might be interested: Darron Gibson (Man Utd), Chris Baird and Zoltan Gera (Fulham), Nabil El Zhar (Liverpool), Gareth Bale (Spurs), Michael Johnson and Benjani (Man City), Dan Gosling (Everton), Nathan Delfouneso (Villa)...

One loanee has arrived at St James' - though sadly he's not a new face, but Jonny Godsmark, whose temporary spell at Hereford has been cut short owing to a broken hand that needed surgery.