Light relief

We may have been forced to witness some absolutely awful "football" over the last couple of weeks, but when you're having a shit time of it, it's always consoling to know that there's someone else having a shitter time, isn't it?

So spare a thought for the poor Mackems. Thirteen minutes away from a very creditable draw away at high-flying Spurs, only for Michael Carrick - a Geordie, as if you didn't know - to piss on their chips and consign them to yet another miserable defeat.

Ha ha ha ha ha!

Right, now back to the glum expressions to which we're more accustomed at present...